Portland BFF duo Wampire just keeps throwing down life lessons. First, that it’s acceptable to name your band something an infant might use to refer to The Count on Seasame Street. Second, that middle school friendships can last forever and blue lipstick goes with everything. Lucky for us, the band has shared some new food for thought today: If you’re in grave danger, don’t forget to swap spit with your would-be killer. This advice comes in the form of Wampire’s video for The Hearse, off their most recent LP, Curiosity. The Raphaël Pfeiffer-directed clip takes a page from ’80s daytime dramas, Blockbuster VHS sale shelf damsel-in-distress horror flicks and the silent machismo of film noir. And then throws in a little “What the…” for good measure. Check it out below.